As I type, Chuck Schumer is talking to the AIPAC conference. He recounted a story about how in the 1980s, he and his wife hosted a dinner party featuring Benjamin Netanyahu, then the Israeli ambassador to Washington. For some strange reason, Netanyahu explained Israeli price controls by shaking up a bottle of soda and spraying up Schumer’s place. “My wife always reminds me,” Schumer said. “Bibi, you owe me $1800 in cleaning bills!”

I guess in a room full of Jews, fine, whatever. But c’mon, man, people can see this on CSPAN. You’re embarrassing me.